Posts
A collection of post election jokes
Tide and Rin have competition from Congress. Itni zabardast dhulai hui hai.
There is a great Rahul Gandhi wave in the country... Everyone is waving him good bye.
Congress: "Rahul-baba, jahan bhi ho, ghar aa jao. Mata aur behen dono pareshan hai. Koi kuchh nahi kahega; sari jimmedari Manmohan-uncle ne li hain. Jaldi aa jao, bas."
Sonia and Rahul should not resign. Otherwise, Congress may recover.
Manmohan Singh's wife goes to Sonia Gandhi's house... To get the remote control back.
"Why is the mute button worn out?" asks Mrs Singh.
Manmohan Singh went to the vegetable market, the morning following his resignation.
Manmohan: Gobi kitne ki hai?
Vendor: Bas kar, rulayega kya, pagle? Free hai, tere liye. Pehli baar aawaaz suni hai teri!
Manmohan Singh begins work on his autobiography titled, "5 Mistakes of My Life: 2G, 3G, Sonia G, Rahul G, and Rahul G ke Jija G".
Congress ki samasya ye hai ki jo yuva josh Rahul Gandhi me hona chahiye woh Digvijay Singh me hai.
Ab to Congress ke bhi achche din aane wale hain.
ND Tiwari ke baad, Digvijay Singh bhabhi laane wale hain.
Girlfriend: Jaanu, aaj milte hain.
Boyfriend: Kahan milna hai?
Girlfriend: Koi sunsaan si jagah, jahan koi na ho.
Boyfriend: Thik hai, fir ek ghante me Congress Head Office me milte hain.
Arvind Kejriwal got more slaps than seats!
Even Tata Nano has more seats than the Aam Admi Party!
Arvind Kejriwal says that Aam Janata has also become corrupt.
Modi: How many seats did you get?
Nitish: 2 seats.
Modi: I also got 2 seats. One from Vadodara and one from Varanasi. What are you going to do next?
Nitish: Resign as CM of my state.
Modi: Me too! LOL.
Nitish: Phone rakh tu, saale.
Modi: Aao maje lete hai.
Amit Shah: Woh kaise, bhai?
Modi: Mayawati ko phone lagao aur poochho samarthan dengi?
A Gujju will do anything for a US VISA, even if that means becoming PM.
Obama: Congrats, Mr. Modi, for the victory. Now, let's talk about the VISA problem.
Modi: There is no problem. You can apply for it online. We'll issue it.
Abhi parents ko sochna padega ki bacche ko chai ki dukan pe bhej ke Modi banana hai ya IIT me bhej ke Kejriwal.
Malavath Poorna says she felt 'great' after reaching the summit
A 13-year-old Indian tribal schoolgirl who has become the youngest girl to climb Mount Everest has told the BBC in her first interview that she wants to be a role model for tribal children.
Tide and Rin have competition from Congress. Itni zabardast dhulai hui hai.
There is a great Rahul Gandhi wave in the country... Everyone is waving him good bye.
Congress: "Rahul-baba, jahan bhi ho, ghar aa jao. Mata aur behen dono pareshan hai. Koi kuchh nahi kahega; sari jimmedari Manmohan-uncle ne li hain. Jaldi aa jao, bas."
Sonia and Rahul should not resign. Otherwise, Congress may recover.
Manmohan Singh's wife goes to Sonia Gandhi's house... To get the remote control back.
"Why is the mute button worn out?" asks Mrs Singh.
Manmohan Singh went to the vegetable market, the morning following his resignation.
Manmohan: Gobi kitne ki hai?
Vendor: Bas kar, rulayega kya, pagle? Free hai, tere liye. Pehli baar aawaaz suni hai teri!
Manmohan Singh begins work on his autobiography titled, "5 Mistakes of My Life: 2G, 3G, Sonia G, Rahul G, and Rahul G ke Jija G".
Congress ki samasya ye hai ki jo yuva josh Rahul Gandhi me hona chahiye woh Digvijay Singh me hai.
Ab to Congress ke bhi achche din aane wale hain.
ND Tiwari ke baad, Digvijay Singh bhabhi laane wale hain.
Girlfriend: Jaanu, aaj milte hain.
Boyfriend: Kahan milna hai?
Girlfriend: Koi sunsaan si jagah, jahan koi na ho.
Boyfriend: Thik hai, fir ek ghante me Congress Head Office me milte hain.
Arvind Kejriwal got more slaps than seats!
Even Tata Nano has more seats than the Aam Admi Party!
Arvind Kejriwal says that Aam Janata has also become corrupt.
Modi: How many seats did you get?
Nitish: 2 seats.
Modi: I also got 2 seats. One from Vadodara and one from Varanasi. What are you going to do next?
Nitish: Resign as CM of my state.
Modi: Me too! LOL.
Nitish: Phone rakh tu, saale.
Modi: Aao maje lete hai.
Amit Shah: Woh kaise, bhai?
Modi: Mayawati ko phone lagao aur poochho samarthan dengi?
A Gujju will do anything for a US VISA, even if that means becoming PM.
Obama: Congrats, Mr. Modi, for the victory. Now, let's talk about the VISA problem.
Modi: There is no problem. You can apply for it online. We'll issue it.
Abhi parents ko sochna padega ki bacche ko chai ki dukan pe bhej ke Modi banana hai ya IIT me bhej ke Kejriwal.
Malavath Poorna says she felt 'great' after reaching the summitA 13-year-old Indian tribal schoolgirl who has become the youngest girl to climb Mount Everest has told the BBC in her first interview that she wants to be a role model for tribal children.
She hoisted the Indian flag at the summit and also left a photograph of Dalit leader BR Ambedkar there.
Officials says her achievement is even more impressive as she climbed the peak from the more difficult Tibetan side.
Most climbers attempt the 8,848-metre (29,029-ft) Everest from the Nepalese side, which is easier, but Nepal does not allow climbers under 16 years of age to scale the world's tallest mountain.
At 13 years and 11 months, Poorna is just a month older than the world's youngest Everest climber - American Jordan Romero ascended the peak in 2010 when he was 13 years and 10 months.
She did the climb with Shekhar Babu, an experienced mountaineer, her friend Anand Kumar, a 16 year-old-boy from a poor family like hers, and a group of sherpas.
Rare opportunity"I was initially afraid, but the training I received helped me overcome my fear. I never thought of giving up," Malavath told the BBC, speaking on a satellite phone from Everest base camp on Wednesday morning.
"The aim of my expedition was to inspire young people and students from my kind of background. For a tribal like me, opportunities are very rare and I was looking for one opportunity where I could prove my calibre," she says.
The thing that bothered her the most during her climb was "eating packed food" and she says she sorely missed her mother's cooking, especially her fried chicken.
Poorna, whose both parents work as agricultural labourers in a small tribal village in the southern Indian state of Andhra Pradesh, make about 35,000 rupees ($595; £355) a year.
Encouraged by her parents and her teachers at the local school in her village, Poorna enrolled into a training program for outdoor activities. In preparation for her Everest climb, she trained in the mountains of Darjeeling and Ladakh.
Just three days after her arrival at Everest base camp on 15 April, a deadly avalanche on the Nepalese side of the mountain killed 16 sherpas, but Poorna says the tragedy did not deter her from scaling the peak.
Of the view from the top of the world, she says: "All around me were mountains. It was very beautiful."
